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Showing posts from January, 2012

I'm difficult to date because...

I don't open up very easily about my feelings. I'll talk about anything except those things.I like lots of people and I find value in everyone, which makes it difficult to classify where really liking someone begins.I think too much and try to be rational and objective about love.I empathesize with others and want to hear about their feelings, but don't want to think about my own.I feel too many things at the same time, which is one of the reasons I don't probe too deeply because it's just too complicated.I'll try to detatch myself if I feel too close to someone so I don't get hurt.I use a lot of history metaphors to describe how I'm feeling and those can be hard to understand.There are at least twenty little historical characters in my head telling me to do different things, so if you're trying to woo me, you'll have to convince them too.I'm not like most girls in many ways. You can probably identify those differences if you know me.I'v…

Why I actually hate lists

Most of my feelings don't fit into nice even listsPeople don't belong on lists; they belong in our mindsThey remind me of things I haven't doneLists are detatch themselves from peopleThe work is never donePro and con lists always overlap until you don't know what's a good thing and what's a bad thingThey're kind of addictingThere are better ways to measure things and classify themI'm more of a free writer. What if I change this blog into a free-write vent session?

Why I can't focus on the present

I signed a housing contract at the Colony for Fall/Winter this coming year, which makes me think I'm moving in there soon. (actually 8 months away...)My brother Taylor is living at the Colony next year too, so if that is soon, then he will also soon be back from his mission! (actually 5 months away...)I'm trying to figure out what I really want to do with my life, which involves making sure I'm in the right major(s) (even though graduation is 3 1/2 years away...)I'm planning classes for those intended majors so I'm trying to set up next year's schedule already (8 months away...)I'm trying to figure out possible opportunities for employment this summer so I can come back to school! (3 months away...)All the boys in my ward are getting their mission calls and they leave in next six months and will be for two years! (so 2 1/2 years until they come home...)Tomorrow never comes (one day away)

Things that stress me out

School assignments (papers, tests, etc)MoneyJobs (or lack thereof)SleepMessy housesFuture careersMajors and minorsMaking decisionsNot knowingFriends leavingThinking too much