Two Homes and Still Drifting

I came back to Utah last week. 

Utah that felt like a foreign land in 2011 when I moved out here as a timid and innocent college freshman.
Utah that felt like home when I drove away in 2017 after years of running in the mountain foothills, working closely with BYU professors on campus, and going on adventures with friends. 
And coming back actually felt like coming home despite having moved away a year ago.
I mean, I drove down to Utah Valley Sunday morning for a dear friend's farewell and was instantly overwhelmed with love for the friends who were also there. It felt like a glorious homecoming to the people who helped me learn to call Provo my home and helped me find a better, more outgoing and more authentic version of myself.
And come to think of it, maybe it's not just the magical, green mountains that whisper home. 

It's the people who made this home. 
These feelings of Heimat and belonging are actually a little bit paradoxical because I just left a place that feels like home.
I mean, I have an Indiana drivers license and own a townhouse there which gives me an adult-like permanent address so that says residency for sure.
But thinking about what makes Utah feel like home makes me think that feeling at home in Indiana includes more than a dwelling that gives me a sense of home (and more than my cute little garden as much as I love it).

Because Bloomington's people are my home too.

The people who made me feel like I belonged as soon as I breathed in the humid midwest air.



It's strange to feel so grateful for not one, but two senses of home, neither of which include my hometown anymore and both of which I haven't lived in for longer than five years. 

 I'm living out of my car for the next month while I'm "home" in Utah, not completely sure where I'm sleeping every night but not freaking out too much about it because if I'm home, isn't every where my bed? #hippychild
So I'm happily drifting to and fro the places, people, and communities that I love. 





                                                 Two homes. 
Yet no roots. 
                           Only wings. 

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