The Lists that Govern my Life

Approximately eight days ago, I went to the movie theatre (which is singular in and of itself) with my parents. We saw Into the Woods . Since that fateful day, my brain has continued to play the entire soundtrack on repeat during every waking moment. Which is partly my own fault since I listened to it on Spotify several times after seeing the movie. That’s where the addiction started.   The soundtrack is about an hour long, which means that in eight days I’ve listened to the soundtrack (in my head or in real life) approximately 1000 times. #thishappenswitheverymusicalIsee I’ll try to detox this week with some other obnoxiously catchy music. Anyways, the point of that story (which wasn’t actually quite a story) was to transition into how much I actually enjoyed the musical with its multi-faceted themes, the largest of which comes from its title of course: into the woods . I love things that make you grow. Like vegetables . And missions . And college . And relationsh...

Success ( noun): the favorable or prosperous  termination  of attempts or endeavors; the accomplishment of one's goals. Prosperous termination of attempts? Accomplishment of goals? The dictionary has been a good friend to me for many years, but I can’t say I agree with its definition of success.   And of failure. Failure ( noun): a person or thing that proves unsuccessful Ouch. A s I’ve been pondering the 22 years, 4 months, and 9 days I’ve been alive and especially the last seven months that I’ve been home from my mission, there are many aspects of my life I would be prone to label as “failures.” Because I haven’t really prosperously terminated any endeavors since graduating high school (which sounds like a death sentence) and everything that I've attempted to do in the meantime I am still doing. Meaning I’m not finished. And thus my actions have proved unsuccessful. And that thus makes me...

Once upon a time … calculus hadn’t been discovered and dating didn’t exist . Sure, we didn’t know as much about how the world worked and lots of marriages were ridden with pent-up tension, but isn’t that still the case today? Maybe we know a little more than we did 500 years ago, but I don’t know how many normal-folk ( modern day peasants, if you will ) actually apply what they know. Whether it be with dating, calculus, or some other new fancy invention (like…hand sanitizer WHICH YOU SHOULD USE IF YOU DON’T ). Granted, I never actually took calculus so maybe I’m missing out on some could-have been application, but I still stick by my statement. Things pop up and boast of greater efficiency and productivity than ever before. Do they help you? Once upon a time… a community meant something different . It meant physically and emotionally being there for each other. It meant living in a type of “togetherness” for an extended period of time. Maybe I just missed the boa...

I know I’ve shared this insight from Theodore Roosevelt before, but I just love it so much that I’m sharing it twice, plus I want to talk about the arena ( where I’m currently getting my trash kicked ): “ It is not the critic who counts ; not the man who points out how the strong man stumbles, or where the doer of deeds could have done them better. The credit belongs to the man who is actually in the arena , whose face is marred by dust and sweat and blood; who strives valiantly; who errs, who comes short again and again, because there is no effort without error and shortcoming; but who does actually strive to do the deeds; who knows great enthusiasms, the great devotions; who spends himself in a worthy cause ; who at the best knows in the end the triumph of high achievement, and who at the worst, if he fails, at least fails while daring greatly , so that his place shall never be with those cold and timid souls who neither know victory nor defeat."    Why do I love t...

Last week, I was a nervous wreck . This week, I was an emotional explosion . You know those weeks when those random, little things make you weep like a child —like seeing pictures of blind puppies or holding a stuffed platypus or running out of colored pens because everything seems to forebode stormy skies? That was this week for me. My mom wrote me on my mission once (okay, actually a lot more than once; she was pretty much the best writer ever) after my little brother had left for college and admitted that she’d started bursting into tears whenever she saw babies or commercials for diapers or other things that reminded her she was an empty-nester and though I have no excuse as traumatic as that, I felt similarly this week. Regarding the whole crying sporadically. You know, just doing my thing and then suddenly I'm  weeping like a toddler while watching movies, talking to friends, doing homework, trying to plan the future, seeing the future fall apart, etc. T...