How Not to be a Miserable Peon

I used the word peon approximately 33 times this week. After about the 16th time, my roommate Carol asked what the heck that even meant. Because to her, it sounded like someone getting peed on.
Which I definitely did not mean.
So to be clear about the actual definition of peon, let me (okay actually the dictionary) enlighten you:

1.(in Spanish America) a farm worker or unskilled laborer; day laborer.
2.(formerly, especially in Mexico) a person held in servitude to work off debts or other obligations.
3.any person of low social status, especially one who does work regarded as menial or unskilled; drudge.
any very poor person

When I use the word peon, I’m not trying to make any racial slurs. I am usually referring to a poor person.

The feeling of being low in social status.
A person in unfortunate circumstances.
Someone forced to be humble.
I often use this word to describe myself in the moments when I feel like a peasant but I’ve already overused the peasant metaphor so I try to use a different word to say the same thing but then I end up overusing the word peon so I’m stuck either way.

Instance #1 of peonism from the week:
it snowed and I slid all the way down a
slippery hill on my pants because
my boots couldn't handle the snow
Anyways, this is pretty lame considering the great life that I have, but we’ll skip over the lovely details for now and focus on the concept of peonism. Yes, I just made up not only a new word, but a principle (peonism: the act, thought process, and emotional state of being a peon).

So this week I thought of ways how not to feel like a peasant, peon, or any variation of that thing.

1.    Exercise regularly and with variety
2.    Don’t let anybody pee on you
3.    Put your heart into something or someone—don’t let apathy or fear eat your passions
4.    Embrace frivolity and spontaneity
5.    Allow your adult-self to ask existential questions but let your child-self answer those questions
6.    Get off your spiritual bum
7.    Have a vision of progress and betterment

That’s how you do it. Because peonism shirks away after ten-mile runs, after spontaneous appearances at dance parties, after poning a test, after throwing your whole heart into whatever assets make up your life.

By the way, I did all of these things this week.
Therefore, I am not an actual peon.

Be gone, peonism.


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