What are you doing with life?

"So what are you doing with life?"

a.) "Oh you know, just trucking along and trying to figure things out."
b.) "uh....stuff."
c.) "Well I have a ten year plan laid out with scores of contingency plans if those don't work out, so every day I go to class and work and add another contingency plan--just in case--which leaves my journal looking like a master spider web. Want to see?"
d. "I think I need some space with life but I still want to be alive so I guess you could say things are complicated."


That's kind of a weird question when you think about it, right?

But that's what we ask people when we want to catch up and hear about their oh-so-exciting lives (which more often than not haven't changed significantly over a 23 day span, but sometimes they do so just in case you want to be in on everything).

It's like we picture life as this lump of clay that everyone is given at birth and by the time we're in our twenties, we're supposed have made the lump of clay into something a little less lumpy.

But life is pretty much always lumpy. 

I mean, if you have an artist's eye, then maybe you can see the lumps as something beautiful, but for the most part, I think people want to see this lovely masterpiece of life (not just a ball of clay) that you've created when they ask what they've done with it. Maybe not because they're super judgmental, but simply because they want you to be happy and successful and clay that looks lumpier than when you had it as a toddler doesn't seem to bode well for a less-lumpy future.

What if you are insanely proud of your lump of clay though because you have worked so hard to get the lumps just right and yeah, maybe you have no-the-heck-idea how it will eventually turn out, but that's okay?

What if you wanted the lumps?

What if you take care of your clay every day and are just keeping it soft and moldable so you won't get stuck?

What if you don't want your clay to be finished so soon because there is so much time to still mold and create and the process is the best part anyways?


So what am I doing with life?

Well I'm squishing my lump of clay. Not exactly sure what it will be yet. Sure, I have momentary visions and dreams of how it will look, but life isn't about what it looks like at the end. 
Because the end is just as long as the beginning.

I'm trying to mold life.
It tries to mold me.
I let it be lumpy.
It lets me be lumpy.
I might let you in on the vision I have of it, but maybe that's not as important because right now, I'm just beautifully lumpy.

#doingstuffwithlife